Attraction Vs. Alignment 

Attraction draws two people together.

Alignment determines if they can actually stay together.
Attraction is the spark.
Alignment is the foundation.
Attraction can happen
With anyone who activates your nervous system.
Alignment only happens with someone who shares your values, your emotional maturity and your vision for the future.
If you are choosing partners based only on how strongly you feel, you will continue to repeat the same painful story that leaves you confused or hurt in the end. Because chemistry isn't the challenge—finding someone aligned with your heart is.
Stop choosing sparks that don't know how to stay lit.
Choose the connection that can actually hold the life you're trying to build.
— Sabrina Bandory, Book : Detached
These lines by Sabrina Bandory stay with me. They remind me of my own struggles with attachment. It was a big problem for me. I got attached to someone who treated me nicely. After getting attached, that person became more important than me. I was always scared to lose them. Nowadays, it is not as bad as before.
One thing is always important, confidence. Confidence means clarity. Clarity comes when you do things without doubt. Even if you are confused, if you have built-in confidence, 90% of things get solved.
There was a company that asked me to make a proposal for construction work. I was new to this. But I said yes, I can do it. I researched, and I succeeded. I got this work only because I said yes with confidence. The benefit, I did it, and I learned something. It is not necessary that only past experience builds confidence. The desire to do something and finish it, that is also confidence.
All this sounds good. But confidence gets ruined when you get distracted. Every person has weaknesses and flaws. When you don't work on them, you get ruined and you regret.
In 2019, during covid, Bishesh Dhakal, Sanjay Shah, and I built an institute. It was our idea. First, we ran online classes. We had 20 students. Slowly, we ran online courses for different subjects/software. After the lockdown ended, I continued my job at a consultancy. I was also taking classes at college and had a share in the institute, named Nepal Institute of Engineering. That time, I was earning around ninety thousand rupees per month (NPR).
But distraction kills.
Late-night enjoying, girlfriends, and so on. I didn't save the money. Now I feel regret. That was distraction. It was good and bad both. Good because I learned from it. Bad because money was wasted.
Thinking another way, why do we pay in college? To learn something, right? Same thing for me. It was not wasted. I learned a lesson. Haha..
Confidence made me do all things. Distraction was there to teach me a lesson.
Late-night enjoying doesn't mean I was drinking alcohol. I am vegetarian. I don't smoke or drink wine. Sometimes soft drink or beer; I was okay with that.